Tae's Story of Hope

I'm excited to share Tae's story with you today. Tae is special to me because he is my son-in-law. When he and my daughter got together, they were both in addiction and if you had told me I would ever come to love him like I do, I would not have believed you. It was a rough journey in the beginning but he and my daughter both have surpassed any hope I might have had for their recovery.

Tae’s addiction began around age 14. He needed money to buy whatever he needed to feed that addiction, so he began selling ibuprofen to children and telling them that it was drugs. That would then expand to include selling them rolled tobacco and telling them that it was marijuana. It wasn’t long before he was actually selling marijuana. He would continue down that path for 3 years until he met a young woman that did not want to date anyone who was selling drugs, so he put a halt to his dealing.

At 18, he quit school and got a job at a busy local restaurant. The tips were great, and he was bringing home plenty of cash at the end of each shift. While this could have been a blessing, it only empowered him to go further down the path of addiction. He expanded from weed to drinking to pills to cocaine or essentially anything else he could get his hands on. His girlfriend knew about the marijuana, but he kept the other drugs hidden from her. The influx of cash empowered him to move out of his grandmother’s house and get an apartment with the young lady he was with. He had no experience in adult responsibilities and struggled with paying bills and keeping the household running. As you might expect his car was repossessed, he was evicted from his apartment, he lost his job and his girlfriend left him.

He was forced to stay with one of his brothers and became depressed about the situation, especially the loss of his girlfriend. He began to hang out with another young woman (my daughter) and they discovered that they liked to do drugs together. They enjoyed that lifestyle together for a moment before it began to catch up with them. She introduced him to meth, and it took a hold of his life like nothing else ever had and that became his drug of choice. They would spiral downwards for over a year feeding their meth habit until they were homeless and their families had limited contact with them.

Tae and his girlfriend decided in the depths of their addiction that it would be a good idea to get married and have a child. Tae says, “That just goes to show you what meth will do to your brain.” They traveled with our family to Hilton Head, South Carolina for our Thanksgiving celebrations that year. She began to tell him that she thought she was pregnant, but he didn’t think it was possible. When they returned, he was able to get his job at the restaurant back. While he was working one day, she showed up with three bright-pink positive pregnancy tests. He was afraid but they continued using and staying in the house with no utilities that they were squatting in. He lost that job again.

Finally, about a month after they found out that they were pregnant, they decided that they would go to rehab. He entered Brother Bryan Mission in Birmingham, AL on January 9th, 2020. His plan was to walk in and walk right back out after my daughter and I left but he decided that if he could make it through the door, he would give it a shot. To his dismay, we didn’t leave until he had made it through the doors. January 10th of that year is his official clean date. There would be no meth or drugs from that point forward.

He describes the journey that started that day as a new adventure. He rekindled his relationship with God and grew closer to him than he had ever been. He restored his relationship with his family. He got to see the grandmother that he had grown up with and had been close to for the first time in two years. He also earned his GED while he was there. He talks to his mother and brothers occasionally but is in regular contact with the grandparents that raised him. His girlfriend entered a separate rehab facility the same day and they were able to rebuild their relationship on a much healthier foundation.

In June of 2020, their son, Jeremiah, would be born healthy and completely drug-free. They dedicated him to the Lord in the church his mentor pastored, and they began serving there. Her time in rehab was finished but he still had time to go. Just after he graduated in 2021, they married in the church she had grown up in. He began to join her at the Celebrate Recovery meetings at that church. They would both complete the 12-steps class and become leaders in the ministry. They now both lead others through the 12-steps, lead open-share small group, work and lead in the ministry’s childcare area and are approved sponsors for the ministry. They got their own place, decent cars, and he got a job with good pay and great benefits. He has also entered Liberty College and joined the seminary program. It can be stressful at times, but it is a worthwhile adventure.

In July of this year, they welcomed a second child, a baby girl. There were some complications when she was born but they leaned on their faith in God and the support system they had built at their church and their CR and God was faithful to see them through. She is now doing great, growing well, and eating like a champ!

When asked what he would say to some one whose loved one is struggling with addiction, he said, "Be patient! Scripture says 'Be still and know that I am God' for a reason." He recently advised a coworker with a loved one struggling with meth addiction to be patient. He explained that they have to enter recovery on their own terms. "You can't force or manipulate them into it. They have to know that they want it for themselves. Reach out to them and let them know that you love them and that you are here for them when they truly need you. They are going to have bad days out there and need to talk to somebody and that person may be you. It will begin to plant seeds. You know that they are in addiction and they know that you know that they are in addiction. Just the fact that you would sit and listen to them goes a long way. I'm not saying you should step over a boundary that you have set for you and that person but be there for them at least emotionally. But don't get too emotionally attached. The worst thing you can do is get too attached emotionally to some one in addiction and then they end up falling and you blame it on yourself. Be there for them emotionally but not physically because an addict can be manipulative at times, but listen to them. Hear them out. Love on them. Because when that person does want help, that person is going to come to you. That's what I advised my coworker and low and behold he reached out. He's still in addiction but he took that first step of picking up that phone and reaching out to somebody."

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:1-2

To see Tae's testimony reel on Instagram go to https://www.instagram.com/p/CjBVdyXJkh3/

God loves you and has you in the palm of his hand!

Testimonies and photos are submitted by the subject of the testimony. No effort has been made to corroborate any facts or details. Story is told as reported by the subject of the testimony.